I never imagined the challenge being a mother to five children would be. I know there are many others who take it in stride, and even with more children than I have. I remember the moment Natalie was placed in my arms, I felt a divine peaceful reassurance of completion. It was the same feeling I had at the close of my mission. Happy they're all here, but still wondering if I'll ever get my sea legs.
It was around Christmas that I became keenly aware of how I'm drowning in my own life. I was sick for the entire month of December, which made holiday preparation especially taxing. We managed to decorate the tree, wrap the presents, and set out the stockings. Thanks to Brent for putting up our house lights. Everything else stayed in the boxes. Granted, we had plans to move right after Christmas, but still it is unlike me not to decorate for the season.
Lately, I have come to realize that time is of the essence, that efficiency is crucial, and that wasted time often turns into missed opportunity. The pace has quickened to the level that my time is filled with more and more work, and less and less play. For this reason, in the morning, I am on my knees asking for guidance to direct my focus on what is most important, and at night, seeking reassurance that I have done my part well.
I am grateful for my calling as a mother...all the joy, disappointment, chaos, cherished moments, and everything all rolled up into one. I don't always like it, but a lot of the time I love it, even though some of the time I feel like I'm completely failing at it. No matter how I feel at the given moment, I always know it's what the Lord has asked of me, so I gladly do it willingly.
It was around Christmas that I became keenly aware of how I'm drowning in my own life. I was sick for the entire month of December, which made holiday preparation especially taxing. We managed to decorate the tree, wrap the presents, and set out the stockings. Thanks to Brent for putting up our house lights. Everything else stayed in the boxes. Granted, we had plans to move right after Christmas, but still it is unlike me not to decorate for the season.
Lately, I have come to realize that time is of the essence, that efficiency is crucial, and that wasted time often turns into missed opportunity. The pace has quickened to the level that my time is filled with more and more work, and less and less play. For this reason, in the morning, I am on my knees asking for guidance to direct my focus on what is most important, and at night, seeking reassurance that I have done my part well.
I am grateful for my calling as a mother...all the joy, disappointment, chaos, cherished moments, and everything all rolled up into one. I don't always like it, but a lot of the time I love it, even though some of the time I feel like I'm completely failing at it. No matter how I feel at the given moment, I always know it's what the Lord has asked of me, so I gladly do it willingly.
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